Well, hello there! It seems like such a long time since we spoke, and I have missed you on so many occasions. How have you been?
I kind of disappeared all of a sudden, without very much warning, didn’t I? I hadn’t realised just quite how confusing that would be until several of you mentioned wondering where I had disappeared too. The truth is that I had an epiphany moment one day when I realised I needed to step away for the sake of my own well-being and I wasn’t even sure I’d come back.
Have you ever had a moment like that, when out of nowhere you just know you need to step away for a while in order to find your feet once more? Looking back I can see that I had known deep in my heart I needed to do it for such a long time but, as is so often the case, I resisted it for far too long. So when that moment of clarity arrived I acted upon it swiftly and surely and I didn’t look back.
I cannot tell you how good it has been for my soul to put that distance between myself and what I had been doing here at The Patch. The past 5 years have been such a massive challenge for my little family in so many ways and by blogging so openly and honestly about it I found that every time I came online I was reminded of each battle, each wound, each pain. I wasn’t able to give my heart, soul, mind, or body chance to heal and that was what I so desperately needed to do.
So you can imagine how amazing it felt to get away, put some distance between myself and the past, and allow myself the chance to begin finding out who I am now and what I want from life. It’s an ongoing process but I finally feel like I have reached a place where I am able to see the scars healing where there were only open wounds a few months ago. I think the best way to sum this up is in a thought that came to me just the other day…
If you want to add value to the lives of others, you have to first add value to your own
It’s akin to the old saying “Healer, Heal Thyself” really isn’t it? For too long now I have been trying to help inspire, encourage, and support others when I desperately needed to do that for myself first. Over the past few weeks I have started taking great strides in that direction and I have to say it is really making things flow in such a different way than they were before.
Words are suddenly pouring out of my heart and onto the page where once the fear within me kept them locked up. And opportunities to make life-long dreams come true are starting to appear, making me wonder how on earth I ever missed the connection that seems so obvious now (more on this later, it is a whole new direction for me which I’m currently working on behind the scenes).
Even more amazing, for me, is that now that I have started to value my own well-being enough to ask for help I am finding that support is coming from so many different directions I can hardly believe it . Just this past week an unexpected package arrived in the post which came at exactly the moment I was beginning to question things that only a gift like that could answer. And suddenly I find that I have the overwhelming urge to reopen The Family Patch and start reconnecting with you all with a lighter heart and a happier mind.
I’ve given it all a bit of a freshen up, to mark the occasion as I come back to blogging here, but don’t be surprised if it continues to change over the coming weeks. For the first time in far too long I actually feel like it doesn’t matter what I write or how I write it here at The Patch – this space is my own and it is a place for me to do what matters to me. That freedom is something that has been lacking for far too long here and I am so happy to change it.
So, all I have left to say is that I am so very glad to welcome you back here to my little online home. I do so love having you here and I cannot wait to catch up with you all.
I’m sharing this post with the #sharethejoy linky over at The Joy Chaser as being back here at The Family Patch really does bring me a lot of joy!